I dunno why i am feeling like this again.. Its like the cycle is ever rotating.. Right now as much as i wanna cry my hearts out i jus need to be stronger that bein alone is not so bad afterall.. Have my fair share of the deal.. Dunno why i am ever so looking for the real love. The one tat lasted for years and years..

Guess my luck is not as lucky as some ppl are. They met and they fall in love ever so sincerely and lasted together so long.. For me i always like to make a challenged to myself.. If the relationship lasted till my birthday it would be an everlasting one. nontheless its never the case. Never happen..

Sure i have frens we all do have frens but how many can we actually call frens those who really accept u for the real u the one tat will go thru the pain and the joy together..

It feels so demoralising sometimes to the extend i guess i better keep things to myself thus the reason why i stop writing my blog last time.. Cos i cant bear to lay out my real feelings.. Now i am back to square one. no love no job no money.. Back to where i began coincidentally the same timing like last year.. Tat jus make me feel so useless.

I.. i dunno wat to do next... not expecting anything either.. Sigh jus see wat happens next.. Though i wont give up in searching for both love and career.. So stress as it is but i wont show this side of mine..