Eversince yesterday my body has been feeling very weak. My eyes feels heavy, And i start to have a runny nose. Last nite while watching Malcom in the Middle(1 of my fav show) my bro ask me whether i wanna join him staying the note over at my cousin's place at Gombak there for a movie marathon..

I said yes instantly eventhough my body feels weak and my head heavy. Nevertheless i took a hot shower and tat made me feel slightly better. Thank God my bro ride the bike. So we reached there within 15 mins plus minus. And i was greeted by my 3 yr old nephew who is so ever hyper active. "Pak Su" "Pak Su" he shouted.. He is so cute.

The thing isi have two cousins living the same place once is at level 4 and the other is at level 7. So as expected everybody was at level 4 the main meeting point. One of my cousin Abg Sopi ordered pizza so we had a great feast.
Later at nite when all the kids asleep we began our movie mania...right after my bro burn the Hari Raya Photos for Abg Ki. Tat took abt an hr plus.

So most of the time we stayed up talking and discussing abt next week fmaily chalet. In the end we all slept ard 6 in the morning.. Tat is really not helping out. Cos i am sick now.. he he. Oh well i cant wait for the Chalet..

Ok for the past few days has been a wonderful one for me. Went out non stop and it sure beats staying cooped up at hme anticipating calls from companied tat i applied for.. It was a great emotional break. Never felt as liberated. So we began with Sunday. Tat Sunday was suppose to be a very special day bcos its the day where we all the Golden frens dressed up he he. It was a meeting to comemorate the leaving of Is into the NS world. So there we were at PS . Well actually we were suppose to meet up at Shaw mac but me, murni and khai were late so the rest me tup at Ps instead and have our early dinner at Esteller. i must say the food there are affordable as well as sumptous. Unfortunately Murni had a bad stomachache tat nite. Well we hung out till 10 plus before heading home.



The next day i am suppose to meet my fren to try out at this Aetos company but unfortunately i was stood up. Wat a day to begin. Nevertheless the day was mended when i joined shook,murni,nisa,fai and at the later part khai, huda and is. Headed down to PS again and met them at BK. and after tat went over to Paradiza to play some pool. and after tat went to Esplanade and send murni off to work and we hang out ard the area b4 heading to bugis and met Is and Huda at Watsons and then off to have late dinner at Tekka. Huda ,Is and Fai had tosei i think. It looks delicious but i was too full to eat. so we headed home after tat..Below are some of the pics taken. Ps. i still dunno wat to change in my template. dunno if i should change the skins..

This is wat i feel for u ..... honestly from the btm of my heart.. hope u like the song..

I don't want to go another day
So I'm telling you exactly what is on my mind
Seems like everybody is breaking up
Throwing their love away
I know I got a good thing right here
That's why I say (Hey)

Nobody's going to love me better
I must stick with you
Forever
Nobody's going to take me higher
I must stick with you
You know how to appreciate me
I must stick with you
My baby
Nobody ever made me feel this way
I must stick with you

I don't want to go another
So I'm telling you exactly what is on my mind
See the way we ride
In our privated lives
Ain't nobody getting in between
I want you to know that you're the only one for me
And I say

Nobody's going to love me better
I must stick with you
Forever
Nobody's going to take me higher
I must stick with you
You know how to appreciate me
I must stick with you
My baby
Nobody ever made me feel this way
I must stick with you

And now
Ain't nothing else I can need
And now
I'm singing 'cause you're so, so into me
I got you
We'll be making love endlessly
I'm with you
Baby, you're with me

So don't you worry about
People hanging around
They ain't bringing us down
I know you and you know me
And that's all that counts
So don't you worry about
People hanging around
They ain't bringing us down
I know you and you know me
And that's why I say

Nobody's going to love me better
I must stick with you
Forever
Nobody's going to take me higher
I must stick with you
You know how to appreciate me
I must stick with you
My baby
Nobody ever made me feel this way
I must stick with you

Nobody's going to love me better
I must stick with you
Forever
Nobody's going to take me higher
I must stick with you
You know how to appreciate me
I must stick with you
My baby
Nobody ever made me feel this way
I must stick with you

Ok... After a hot shower.. i manage to calm myself down... though i know the trouble wont go away..atleast i manage to remain my sanity.... iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii try to look on the bright side........

Sigh.. today seems like never ending to me.. I feel so restless. I just cant stand it any longer staying coop at home.. Man.. i so badly wanted to get out of the house and jus go somewhere but atlas my ezlink card is left with only 56 cents.. Darn it.. I am trying not to show everyone how upset i feel at the moment..If i were to follow my heart i would jus get out of the house and walk wherever my feet carries me.. But i am not crazy yet to do something like tat.. At least not now..

At times like this i would console myself by trying to dream tat i am a very magical place a place where i dun feel so rundown.. Where the air is always fresh and light without sadness feelings circling ard or i would imagine i am doing something good for the world.. Like in a special force or something.. But atlas these are all illusions..

I never felt so lonely like today.. My brother was hogging the comp all day and i only manage to lay my hands on the notebook now.. Haiz.. i jus cant help but feeling so down.. I guess from today onwards its not going to be the same.. I am loosing my appetite to eat or maybe i am refraining myself from eating.. i dunno..

Just now something my brother said really pierce right thru my heart. I know he is joking but man.. it sounded so real.. I wanted to get up after hours laying in the living room conquering the tv (since he is in my room conquering the notebook)and stumbled upon a bowl of rambutan seeds. tat was the onyl thing i ate today. And he was seating at the sofa back then.. I quote wat he said, " You can jump off the block but don't dirty my house"..

The response in my heart was.."Keep on wishing and it might jus come true one day".. I know currently i am not being productive at all.. I am broke... i am jobless.. i am jus a burden.. but i am desperately trying my best to secure a stable job..No one knows tis but each day tat comes by i try to swallow the sadness and pain and loneliness i feel.. I lock the emotions up within me and try to take the day as cheerful and happy as i could.. Sometimes i ask myself... how could anyone have a fren like me.. cos i cant even carry my duty as a son and a brother well let alone be a fren to someone or to ask for someone to love me.. I can barely go out of the house cos my ezlink card value is limited..

Right now... i jus wanna walk out of the house and jus leave everything behind.. walk away... and if i could stay alive tat would be considered lucky. At least i wont be a burden to anyone..

About this sunday.. I dunno if i could make it.. Maybe i jus walk my way from clementi to wherever the gang decided to meet up... i dunno.. i really want to meet the rest.. Another option i could sell of the hp tat i held so dear.. I carry with it wherever i go even carry it to sleep right beside me.. And i could use the money for a while ..maybe get a ring and surprise tat someone.. But.. how can i sell off something tat i treasure eventhough i could not use it..

You see wat i mean.. How desperately state i am in.... My heart is bleeding from the inside.. my eyes are dry but its crying without tears.. I.......am..... depressed.... Maybe i could sleep it off.. and jus wish i wont wake up again.....

Ok aku kembali lagi. Kali ini aku ingin berbual sepatah dua mengenai keluargaku. Sejak kehilangan bapaku oleh kerna beliau kahwin lari dan tinggal kan kami sebatang kara, sedara maraku adalah keluargaku. Mereka juga adalah kawanku terutama keluarga Mak cik ku Mak Uda. Aku sungguh rapat dengan kak Mas dan Kak Ina. Mana ketidak kerna aku dibesarkan bersama kakak Ina ku.
Talian persaudaraan kami sunnguh rapat sehinggakan kami anggapkan diri masing masing sebagai adik beradik. Tapi sekarang mereka dah berumah tangga jadik tak la serapat dulu. Namun tali persaudaraan kami masih kental. Aku gembira kerna walaupun keluargaku berpecah belah aku ada sedara mara yang sungguh rapat. Termasuk mak cik dan pak cik ku. Nasib baik Ibuku ada byk adik beradik jadi kami tidakla rasa kesunyian. Di bawah adalah petikan gambar yang diambil semasa bbq di east coast sempena menyambut kenaikkan pangkat sedaraku Abg Ki..
Siti dan Aniz. Assistant ku panggang ayam.
Hah inilah aku sedang sibuk panggang ayam sehingga terpaksa bukak baju pakai singlet.
Kak Mas dan suaminya Abg Hirman. Sentiasa ceria!
1/4 dari sedara maraku. Kak Ina bertudung hitam, Siti berbaju baseball, Ashraff badan besar dan Aniz manja.
Dan buat penutup aku siarkan gambar ku he he. Sexy Gue! berpeluh-peluh giler.

Murni asking abg Ki for forgiveness..,




Aww so Cweet..Couple of the day



Girl Power!! U guys Rock Man!


Shook and Nisa fighting who got a better candid shot


Jus priceless.. So nice the pic

All i can say i had a blast. Its never bore to be with my Fantastic Fwens.. U guys.. really are the apple of my eyes. Everyone single of u.. I will never have a boring moment when we are together. And on behalf of abg Ki thank you for coming to the open house. And sorry if i was'nt tat a good host. Nevertheless i tried my best.. Till we meet again. PS. Murni.. i jus dunno wat u r going thru rite now but please stop feeling sad k.. I know u r feeling sad.. Its not worth it.. I miss the Lively and Bubbly Teddy.. Please come back..

Ok.. for the past few days i've been so emotionally down.. Heck its getting a bit out of hand.. So now i have decided. I am not gonna be bothered anymore. So wat if i am In a terrible state now.. I am not gonna be like tis forever cos i wont let it.. Wat i need now is luck and perserverence. I need to look things on the brightside. Come on Zaid u've been thru worst times than this.. So wat if ur financial status is clipped at the moments. Jus need to keep on searching for tat opportunity.

Remember the one who gives up before the battle ends is a sore loser.. and u r far from being a loser. Tat aside.. And to my beloved. Well u know i know how i feel towards u..Jus be patient with me and i am sure we can work things out. Cos to me being in a relationship is all abt compromising with the situations. If the situation gets tough we should be tougher. So yea i am definitely feeling better abt myself. Hope it stays tis way for as long as it could..

Bagaimana harus ku mula.. Aku tak tahu kenapa kedudukan ku sekarang amat terganggu. Berapa lamakah harusku tangani cabaran yg dilimpah kepadaku. Kawanku.. maafkan aku sekiranya aku tak dpt keluar bersama kamu semua semana sekalian kerap berjumpa.

Aku rasa malu sebenarnya.. sungguhku malu sekali kerna aku ni papa kedana sekarang. Tak ada hasil langsung. Aku sedang giat mencari kerja kembali tetapi apa kan daya dari beribu-ribu resume yang aku hantar tak ada satu pun yang balas. Ada kala ku rasa macam hendak berputus asa. Tetapi jikalau aku berbuat sedemikian aku akan kalah.. Kalah kepada cabaran yg diberikan kepada ku dan aku adalah sesorang yg tidak suka mengaku kalah sebegitu saja. Ramai yang ingat aku tidak berusaha.. hanya Tuhan saja yang tahu..

Haiz... Aku bukan nya mengharapkann belas ikhsan tetapi apakan daya aku sedih... Sedih kerna aku tak dapat keluar seperti dulu. Keluar tanpa risaukan bahawa aku kekurangan duit.. Aku tidak mintak menjadi begini. Situasiku seolah olah seperti seorang pengemis yg selalu ku nampak digeylang.. Tak ku sangka ku terjerumus dlm keadaan sebegini sekali..

Keluargaku tak seperti keluarga yang lain.. Mereka punyai ibu bapa yang stable.. Keluarga yang kukuh..Sentiasa ada tempat untuk meminta duit sekiranya mereka kekurangan.. Sungguhku kagumi kamu semua.. Keluargaku berpecah belah.. Aku tiada bapa.. Ibuku hanya bekerja sambilan di masjid.. Tetapi sekarang cuti sekolah jadi ibuku tidak dapat mendatangkan hasil apa apa walaupun beliau ingin bekerja.. Abg dan kakakku yg menatap di JB sering meminta duit dari ibuku.. Aku rasa sungguh pasrah.. Kerna aku tak dapat menolong keluargaku buat masa sekarang,

Kepada mu yg ku sayangi..aku teramat terhutang budi kepadamu kerna menolongku disaat saat ku yg terdesak ni.. Aku minta maaf jikalau ku tak dapat memberimu kebahagian dan kemewahan buat masa sekarang. Sekiranya kau berjumpa dgn jejaka yg lebih kemampuan pergilah kau bersamanya.. Aku tahu kau mempunyai masalah sendiri juga. Aku tak mahu masalah ku memberatkan bebanmu.. Sayang.. sesungguhnya kau adalah insan yang ku sanjungi dan yang ku cintai.. Maafkan aku.. kerna aku tak dpt membuatmu bahagia dlm keadaan sebegini.. Jikalau kau ingin pergi.. Aku akan sentiasa berdoakan kesejahteraan mu...

Its raining tonite.. As i look outside my bedroom window the surroundings are so calm.. Wet and slippery and short breeze blows into my bedroom once a while.. The atmosphere is so calm.. But i cant say the same with me..I am not myself today jus dunno why seems to be moody. Guess lots of things are on my mind.. Sucks man.. Jus sux big time.. One thing abt being me its jus tat i am unpredictable. So annoying at times.. Not tat i want to be tat way though..

I am rage and at the same time half dead but nevertheless manage to put on a false fascade. Dun ask me how i do it but i guess being a scorpio tat makes me good at hiding my real emotions and jus look as cheerful as if i have nothing to worry abt in tis world.

Maybe tat explains why i could'nt really sleep last nite.. Toss and turn till dawn and still can't get to sleep. Have u ever felt like u r sleeping but then u feel u r awake and aware of the surrondings ard u. No? Well tats wat i felt last nite..I think i am beginning to loose myself huh. Ha ha ha and oh ya i shave my goatie..Wrong Move! Now i look sucky.. Ok maybe over-reacting a bit here but hey self confidence is impt to me k. Which also explains y i think i look terrible in today's photo-taking session muahahaha. Probably maybe i dun really have the mood..

Oh well sucky sucky sucky day.. i hate it bleargh..

Layakkah aku miliki cinta ini

Sekali lagi hatiku tertanya-tanya adakah aku yg kau betul betul cinta. Atau aku ini hanya pilihan kedua kerna pilihan pertamamu menolak cintamu. Dicorok hati ini aku rasa pilihan pertamamu hanya berbuat keputusan secara terburu-buru. Dalam firasatku beliau masih menyintaimu.. Mengapa haruskah beliau melukai dirinya sendiri.. Kerna terus terang kasih antara kamu berdua dapat ku rasai..

Dan apatah lagi kamu sudah pun membuat keputusan untuk bersamanya.. Aku tidak lah begitu pasrah malah aku bahagia lihat kamu berdua riang gembira dan asyik saling bergurau senda antara satu, seperti bak pepatah pinang dibelah dua.. amatlah cocok sekali.

Aku rasa kedudukan ku sekarang ini sungguh la sulit.. Layakkah aku bercinta? Layakkah aku menerima kasih yg selalu ku inginkan dlm keadaan yg menyedihkan ini.. Keadaan yg aku maksudkan ialah aku masih tidak bekerja.. tidak ada hasil apa apa. Malah ingin keluar pun sungguh perit sekali. Siapakah harus aku mengadu.. Yang dapat aku lakukan ialah meluahkan rasa hati terpendam ku di sini.. Kaulah tempat ku bersedih, bergembira dan menenangkan diriku yang sentiasa dlm berkecamuk..

Setiap kali kau ingin membantuku aku rasa sedih.. kerna sepatutnya aku yg harus berbuat demikian..Bila kau pelawa untuk mengisikan kad ez-link ku aku rasa sunnguh berat hati menerima bantuanmu.. Bagaimana harus ku cakap...Aku rasa terhutang budi kepadamu.. Aku cuma pasrah dengan diriku.. Pasrah kerna aku tak mampu membuat apa apa buat masa sekarang. Nak tgk wayang bersama pun aku tidak mampu.. Hatiku retak..Layakkah aku membenarkan diriku menerima cinta..

Apa yang kau lihat pada diriku..Aku hanya adalah sebuah insan yang miskin..yang masih tercari cari mana letaknya pendirianku.. Hanya satu yang ku pinta.. usahla kau memaksa dirimu untuk mencintaiku.. kerna aku tak layak... Orang sepertiku mungkin lebih baik ditinggalkan bersendirian.. Apa la yang ada pada diriku ini.. Aku sendiri masih mencari jawapannnya..

FantasTIC FwENS Biography




This is Ismail Masdi. Nick Name: IS. Super Power: A fashionista God. His super strength is to be able to design and wear his own style regardless of how atrocious it may look to the normal human beings.To him nothing else matters as long as he feels good abt himself. Truly a fashion freak. I bow to u. All hail Fantastic Is. Currently Is is waiting for his enlistment somewhere in Dec.. but hey dun worry bro we will be here when u come back! Tats one Fantatsic Fwens down. Now On to the next member of the team.





Ppl call her Murni but she is alson known as TEDDY. Super Power: A being with remarkable winning white colgate smile. One look at her shiny smile is enough to blind the naked eyes. Her presence is always the "Cahaya" in the crowd cos she always got to be teased. Advance warning, this super hero would bring u down and i mean Down if u mess with her. Dun be fooled by her demure looks. If u step on her live wire u would be lucky if u could see the next living day light..




This Super Hero is another remarkable being. Her name: Khairu Nisa. Nickname: "Emocore lady" in disguise. Dont be mistaken by her sweet enchating appearance. This man killer has a way with getting wat she wants. She can hog on the phone like there is no tomorrow. Her electic choice of songs could amaze you. Not a regular lady here. Full of personality and easy going syndrome. If u get close to her u might jus get caught in her Crazy like moods. So beware.




Eventually the Head of the Fantastic Fwen Gang. Super Hero Name: Shookri. Nick: "I H.A.T.E U." As u can tell from the nick he would say tat to u if u get on his nerves so take note., This super hero character is funny at times too. He is uncertain. One moment he could be all mysterious and quiet and the other wild and crazy. REally dangerous if u get too close to him. His fav brand is S&K. No idea wat tat is then i reckon u check the store out at Wisma Basement. Another great member of the team.

Kawanku MUTIARAKU

Nak katakan hidupku sekarang ni selalu sering di iringi dgn kekosongan tetapi orang orang yg dpt mengubati perasaan tak tentuku adalah kawanku. Kawanku aku sgt terhutang budi kepada kalian semua. Tanpa korang dah lama aku rasa aku hilang pendirianku..

Aku sedang dilamun pelbagai cabaran buat masa sekarang ini. Byk yg perlu difikirkan.. Mana nak cari kerja stable, mana nak byr bill talipon, mana nakku sayang pendek kata tak abis la. Macam macam. Sungguhpun buat masa sekarang aku tak dpt bersamamu sgt sekalian kawan kawanku, jgn la fikir bahawa aku menjauhi kamu semua. Kerna kamu semua sentiasa di dlm hatiku. Dan aku dekati diriku kepada kamu semua melalui msn. Mujur ada notebook kalau tidak aku tak tahu la bagaimana nak mengentalkan persahabatanku bersama korang semua.

Walaupun aku rasa aku tak dpt berjuma atau lepak ngan korang selalu, Korang sentiasa berada disisiku. Terima kasih kawanku, Shook,Nisa,Murni,Is,Shahdan,Shahidah... Semoga korang bahagia selalu.. Insya Allah.

Right now.. I jus dunno wats happening.. Ever heard the phrase "It only take 10 seconds to fall in love" but it also takes the same time to fall heartbroken. Urgh.. my mind is in a mess feels like i could burst any moment!! I am sad i am angry i am everything u can think off.

Do i deserve to love especially in tis spot tat i am being jobless and always having trouble in financial issues trying to make ends meet. Heck i even have difficulty to go out with my frens whom i wish i could be ard them all the time.Let alone to go on dates..I cant expect my date to treat me cos its not right. I dun wan to feel as if i am making use of tat person. No i dun! I cant live cooked up at home all the time. It pains me to even ask my mom for money cos she herself is not working now. Whats wrong with me. Whats wrong! I feel so helpless god damn it and i hate tat. Why can't i jus have a normal life?! I know tis is jus a part and parcel of life. Life is full of ups and downs. Why am i being punished this way.. It took me a great deal to find love and when i eventually found it.. I cant quite grasp it. I wanna break down really i want cos i cant accomplish anything not at tis rate.Yet i yearn for tat special companionship..

I really dun want to loose tat someone. U are so special. I am always known for the type "its all or nothing" i dun wan to settle for anything less. But its not entirely up to me to decide. I can only persevere so much.. Still i dun want to back down i dun wanna. but its making u in a tight spot trying to decide.. And i cant take it if we jus be frens cos to me once i dated tat person we r no longer frens we r something more. Face up to reality how can someone whom dated jus be frens.. After all the journey they went thru..Its so insane if anyone think tat is possible..

Man... i am so mad.. mad at myself. Cos i cant even juggle my life right. I am stuck here.. I need to get over this mess! Shit i cant pretend everything is allright anymore cos its not! I cant keep saying "its ok"..Cos its not..So wat can i say.. I open up my heart to love and again i am being hurt.. So is'nt it better i jus die. At least my misery in this world will end. I jus deal with my sins in the afterworld.But if i were to die tat would jus mean i give up and i am not tat kind of person who gives up easily. Only when i tried my best and i dun achieve wat i aimed then i would give up..

For this case i am jus confuse.. Should i stay. If i stay U would be in a tight spot and the other person would be in a bad position too. If i go.. the only person who would suffer is me.. Come to think of it i may get immune to it since i am always the one who suffer. But still i dun wan to go. I jus cant. Why God u r playing with my heart.. It hurts so much. I can only handle so much of ur games..

Lets jus say a scenario with 3 parties. I call them "A", "B" and "C". "A" met "B" one day while was on a outing with "A" frens and they got to know each other from there.. Soon right after they meet up again and again. Had wonderful times together and "A" beginning to fall for "B". All along "A" wanted someone to love and be loved and due to its past failed relationships it was afraid to succumb to its own emotions. But as always "A" gather all the courage it can find to start over again aware tat it might get hurt again or not.

So there they were "A" and "B" having such a good time with each other enjoying each other company kissing each other on 2nd date everything felt so great so special. And one day "B" said to "A" tat it like "A". True enough "A" was feeling the same way but it did not express itself jus as yet.. Until one night "A" said "A" likes "B".. But its not as easy as "A" tot it would be..

"B" met with another person "C" whom happens to be almost everything "B" is. And as equally as special as "A" is.. Too good to be true.. So now "B" is in a difficult position. Could not decide whom to choose.. No doubt "A" is always cheerful and even to situations like tis "A" plays its cards well.. Deep down "A" wanted things to work with "B" but since there is another party involve now "A" is unsure.. "A" is beginning to feel the chemistry with "B", it enjoys every single moment they spent. The telephone conversations, the stupid jokes they both shared and all.

It jus saddens "A" a bit tat maybe it should jus hold itself back and let "B" go with "C". Anything to see "B" happy and saves it the trouble of trying to make a decision of whom to choose..Maybe "A" is jus not fated to be loved..Its jus complicating.. So wat will it be..remain as a fren? or something more? Well its not entirely "A" decision. It lies with "B" too with wat it wants...

If its for the best.. "A" will jus keep these to itself and remain nonchalant abt it.. Cos it does'nt want to put pressure on "B"..

First of all.. Man.. i so dig this song! And my left eye hurt like hell.. I think its time i loose the contact lenses.. Which means i cant wear my fav shades anymore!!! Boring seh. Today i had a nice day out la. Everything jus fall into place. the weather was so nice. Would'nt wanna for anything more. Blue clear skies, sunny and cool breeze once a while. Never felt so liberated to be out today.

Was suppose to be out by 145 but as usual i was late ar. Cos cant decidde wat to wear so eventually decided to put on this green knitted sleeveless top ar since it hot anyways and my S&K shoes.The one and only. Met Khai under my block and we took 106 from my place to town.

The bus was kinda crowded la for tat kind of timing suprisingly. Ok lets make it short la when to Orchard Khai wanted to catch a movie "A lot like Love" or something like tat wheras me i wanted to watch "Tom-Yum-Goong" a fighting show. The actor also acted in another move called "Ong Bak" abt Muay Thai Boxing. This time ard he fought for his elephants which in Thai culture is one of the most respected animal which is also use as a weapon in ancient war. Out of 10 i give it 9! Man his moves are not something tat u normally sees. Totally a diff way of fighting a more superior technique compared to Jacky Chan's stunts and Jet Lee's kungku moves.

Man.. I dun mind watching it again! Oh ya Khai did the most unexpected thing for me. Totally shocking as i never really get someone to buy for me things, Normally i would get stuff with my own money scrimp and save. He bought me this S&K new highcut shoes tat i had my eyes on for quite sometimes since i cant really afford to get the le coq sportif shoes. Tat was the most happiest moment of my life man. Arigato, Nandri and SiSieh ha ha ha Now i have 2 high cut shoes.. Man tats the best birthday present ever.Thank u Khai if u r reading my blog. I jus cant stop saying thank u! Gonna wear that shoes from now on. he he. Oh ya he found a nokia phone in the cinema!! Though its jus a normal colored phone and not anything like the nokia 7260 tat i lost i appreciate it a lot. Now all i need is to get meself a prepaid card. I jus found out now we need to register for prepaid cards if not we can only use it for 6 mths! How absurd right.. Oh well rules are rules. dun wanna mess with the government now,


Shoot its 3:15am later need to wake up early cos need to collect my brother jeans which he sent for tailoring behind my house and at 1pm gotta accompany a fren to redeem ipod nano and at 6 gotta go over another fren's house for Hari Raya cos the mum misses me. Ha ha tat is something new. So guess tats it for now and Ps my eyes feels like there is something stuck in how irritating. hope it gets well tomorrow.

KENAPA

Sebelum ku kenali mu
Hidupku cukup dengan suka-duka
Tak pernah ku sangka semuanya akan
berubah
Dikau bagaikan cahaya, bagi jiwa ku ini
Tak mungkin ku lupa katamu kan
sentiasa di sisi
Bagaikan satu kisah cinta kita berdua
ke mana
Asyik berpegangan tangan orang lain
dilupakan
Apa terjadi, diriku ini masih tertekan
Hati dilukai setelah janji ditunaikan
Tiap kali ku fikir, tiada guna bersedih
Rakan-rakan katakan buang masa
ku cintai
Dikau punca pedihku, tiada baik darimu
Tiada langsung yang benar dalam
ungkapan bibirmu

Kenapa harus ku bercinta
Kenapa ku begini
Kenapa harus ku tanggung semua
Kenapa harus ku bercinta
Kenapa ku percaya
Kenapa aku diperbodoh kasih

Tak mungkin ku lupa kali pertama bersua
Tak sangka, dikau kan menjadi pedih
yang kan dalami jiwa
Siang malam termenung, sedih
memakan hati
Tak pernah ku ingat ku boleh diluka
begini
Namun ku cekal hatiku,
tuk melupakanmu
Ku tahu kau begitu
Malas ku nak rayu, buang tenagaku
Kau takkan mendengarku
Selamat tinggal oh kasih
Janganlah iri hati
Hidup baru kan mula bila terbitnya
mentari

Kenapa harus ku bercinta
Kenapa ku percaya
Kenapa harus ku diperbodohkan
Kenapa harus ku merayu
Kenapa ku percaya
Kenapa harus ku dikecewakan kasih

Kenapa harus ku bercinta
Kenapa ku percaya
Kenapa harus ku diperbodohkan
Kenapa harus ku merayu
Kenapa ku bercinta
Kenapa harus ku pegang janjimu

Kenapa harus ku merayu
Kenapa ku bercinta
Kenapa harus ku diperbodohkan
Kenapa harus ku percaya
Kenapa ku bercinta
Kenapa harus ku pegang janjimu
kasih...

Sekian lama telah ku simpan
rasa ini di hati
Baru kini ku berani tuk mengatakan
oh gadis
Dikau punca segala, kepedihan di hatiku
Tak ingin lagi ku lihat wajahmu
di hadapanku

Sayang Semuanya

Raya tahun ni ok la boleh tahan. Abang dan kakak pulang 2 hari sebelum raya membawa keluarga masing masing. Sungguh gembira rasanya dpt bertemu ngan mereka. Lagi lagi dpt jumpa anak sedara. Kesemuanya ada 7 orang anak sedara!. Abg Norman ada 2 orang anak lelaki Haziq and Daniel keduanya dlm jangka usia 4 tahun dan 6 tahun. Kakak Faezah lak ada 5 org anak yg terdiri daripada Nur Sabrina, Nurul Ain, Nor Laily, Farid Amirul and NurLiyana.

Jadi apa lagik kan. Kecoh la rumah ni. Maklumlah selalunya senyap sepi sehinggakan leh dgr pin jatuh! ha ha k k tu dah kes bedek. Tapi seronok la dpt lihat wajah mereka yg ceria tu. Semua ghairah nak beraya. Kemana me pergi ada jer assistant assistant yang membuntut. Pak busu ini la pak busu itulah. Semua nak cakap serentak kengkadang leh pening dibuatnya.Tetapi seronok la kerna semua macam macam karenah.

Ada yg terkencing kat seluar la semasa ber raya kat umah mak cik dah tu takut nak bergerak nak bilang mak nyer. So apatah lagi Pak su dia juga yang ngelolakan. Cebok kan dier dan cuci seluar melayu dier dah tu gosok ngan sterika kasi kering. Tu tak apa biler jalan raya tak kira nak naik bus atau pun mrt semua berebut nak duduk sebelah me. Ish terharu rasanya hati ini. Maklumlah kerana selalu kesunyian. Duk kat umah selalunya sepi tapi biler mereka datang seolah - olah tunggang terbalik dunia ku ha ha ha. Seronok.. tetapi sedihnya mereka akan pulang sok pagi jam 10.. Sedih tak terhingga hati ni. Yang buat lagi sedih adalah apabila Nurul kata kepada me "Pak su jangan lupakan Nurul tau. Insya allah Nurul akan dtg lagi tahun depan." Apa lagi kan. Cam nak nangis pun ada tapi me cuba act cool la.. Yg kesian nyer si Nurul ni kena chicken pox selang sehari nak dekat raya. Kesian kan. apalah nasib dier tapi hari tu jugak me bawak dier gi 24hr clinic maklumla dier kena chicken pox on my b'day 1st nov, Deepavali so nak bawak to my family clinic lak clinic tutup. Mujur dier dah beransur pulih..dpt raya pun.

Haiz me nangis sekarang ni kerna sedih rumah ini akan sunyi lagi dan me tak ada teman. Tak ada yg akan membuntut me lagi. Tak ada yang akan berebut untuk bersama me. Tak ada yang akan membuat me bingung dgn pelbagai pertanyaan..Mengapalah keluargaku harus berpecah,. Sok mereka akan pulang ke JB..HAti ni sebak tak tahan rasanya. BErlinang air mata ni.. Cuma satu yg me dpt harapkan.. Moga-moga mereka sentiasa dlm keadaan sihat-walafiat dan ceria selalu.. Sekiranya kalau Pak busu ditimpa bencana dan tiada lagi di dunia ini sekurang - kurangnya Pak Busu bersyukur dapat anak sedara yg sentiasa ceriakan hidup Pak Busu..

Malam kemenanagan sudah tiba!

Sesudah sahaja di-istyharkan sok Hari Raya, takbir pula mula bergemar. Suasana Raya amat di rasai.Apatah lagi hatiku sungguh ceria.. Sehari suntuk aku mengemas rumah.. Yer la katakan "personal interior designer" khas untuk rumah sendiri jer la.. Ha ha.Ish sunggguh tak disangka kan Ramadan sudah meninggalkan kiter. Macam cepat gituk eh. Di cerut radio pula kedenagaran lagu lagu raya tak henti henti. Best seh. So lebih bersemangat la kemas rumah.

Tahun ni hall me pilih kaler kuning telur. Terang giler kan.. Tahun yg lepas warna maroon. Macam tak biasa gituk tgk hall. maklumlah dah biasa ngan kaler maroon yg gelap tu sekali kena cat kuning ah kau..ambik obat.. rasa cam lain gituk. Ruang tamu nampak lebih luas maklumla kaler terang kan membuatkan sesuatu ruang tu nampak kelihatan luas. The wonders of colors! ha ha So tadi satu hari suntuk sibuk menemas mana nak pasang langsir, pilih carpet mana satu nak pakai,tukar sarung kusyen kecik, alihkan perabot ish pendek kata macam macam la buat. Mlm semalamnya lak tidur kul 6 pagi kerna nak kena anyam ketupat untuk org order dan sedara mara.. Ni baru dpt rehat.. Sambil sambil la update blog ni.

Justeru itu Zaid ingin mengambil kesempatan menyusun 20 jari jemari. 10 jari tangan dan 10 jari kaki untuk memohon maaf terhadap sesiapa yg mengenali Zaid. Kalau ada terkasar bahasa ka, ter maki hamun ka, ter gatal-gatal ka dan ter ter yg sewaktu dgn nya Zaid harap korang maafkan la Zaid yer. Di bulan yg mulia ini Zaid doakann agar semua bahagia menyambut Syawal di samping keluarga yg terSayang. SELAMAT HARI RAYA AIDILFITRI!! Sehingga ketemu lagik ya. Sempoi!!! ha ha