I dunno y i am still awake at this hr when i should be sleeping.. all i can think of is u my dear.. u make me realise how real u r.. How real we are... True i been in love but not as deep as wat we are having now.. U show to me how diff u are from the rest.. Not those monkey love relationship or even those based soley for looks and a for the sake of having a title "attached"

U love me for me.. and i appreciate tat.. AS day passes my love for u grows stronger and stronger.. I am doin my best to keep the fire strong but at the same time i dun wan to be over doing it.. cos i am afraid if i do i would lose u.. Neither would i want to repeat my past mistakes.. i love u for who u r and wat u are.. a simple lacky and not too much skeletons in the closet..

I wish i could give u diamond and pearls yang.. when we go out how i wish i could foot the bill for the 2 of us.. but alas i cant due to my finance unstability. Sometimes i would want to jus spend without having to worry tat i wont have enuff.. i jus wan to splurge on myself but reality check it will never be possible.. haiz.. my life is miserable..i feel miserable below tis happy face i put up everyday..

Waking up I see that everything is ok
The first time in my life and now it's so great!
Slowing down I look around and I am so amazed
I think about the little things that make life great
I wouldn't change a thing about it
This is the best feeling

This innocence is brilliant, I hope that it will stay
This moment is perfect, please don't go away, I need you now
And I'll hold on to it, don't you let it pass you by

I found a place so safe, not a single tear
The first time in my life and now it's so clear
Feel calm I belong, I'm so happy here
It's so strong and now I let myself be sincere
I wouldn't change a thing about it
This is the best feeling

This innocence is brilliance, I hope that it will stay
This moment is perfect, please don't go away, I need you now
[Innocence lyrics on http://www.metrolyrics.com]

And I'll hold on to it, don't you let it pass you by

It's the state of bliss you think you're dreaming
It's the happiness inside that you're feeling
It's so beautiful it makes you wanna cry

It's the state of bliss you think you're dreaming
It's the happiness inside that you're feeling
It's so beautiful it makes you wanna cry

It's so beautiful it makes you want to cry

This innocence is brilliance, it makes you want to cry
This innocence is brilliance, please don't go away
'Cause I need you now
And I'll hold on to it, don't you let it pass you by

This innocence is brilliance, I hope that it will stay
This moment is perfect, please don't go away, I need you now
And I'll hold on to it, don't you let it pass you by

If i could turn back the time i would.. Haiz a beautiful day turned ugly caused by some nothing better to do bugger..

Right now all i can do is to move on with the day and hope nothing ugly surfaces..We shall go thru tis together sayang.. I cant make things beautiful all the time.. Times like tis is wat brings us closer.. i love u and nothing is gonna change tat...

First of all the let the pics do the talking. then i will elaborate. he he





TOday went back to work at 9am..Cant imagine i am incharged for this project and 2 engineers are working hand in hand with me.. Gosh jus imagine the kiosk to deal with 2 diff personality abd diff expectations. Overall conclusion workload is sure getting heavier now..

Tat aside meeting u for a while really made my day.. Even if it was for a short while. Seeing ur smile jus did the trick. he he.

After tat headed down to my cousins place didnt expect to see some of my other cousins as well and my mom also. so we carried some stuffs over into my room.. it was a work out he he he. furthermore its so hot and sunny today.. love it. After all tat carrying things we headed down to memory lane.. WEnt to Pasir Panjang market.. This place i used to accompany my mom when i was little. She used to buy a lot of dry spices and all for her hawker stall.. Sure bring back lots of memories..

Ok i better not start getting emo here he he he. After tat we headed down to eat at Changi point. wow had the best nasi ayam penyek.. Woohoo! and wat a best way to digest the food by strolling down the Changi point park.. and the sunset jus makes the day complete..

I dunno where to start calculating this month and next month expenses... Even before i get my pay there are like tons of money related subject mounting... Haiz.. talk abt trying to save when wat u earn heart painstakingly goes to ur bills and other money issues..

It feels kinda heart wrenching when u know u cant spend the fruits of your labour...Let me start some claculations.. 1: my 1st starhub bill amounted to $134 inclusive of 6% gst.. my monthly subscription is $45.. dun understand wat the G services is abt cos i have to pay $75 for tat.. my sms-es exceeded by 200 and i have to pay ard $35 so total mounted to $134+. Scary but have to accept it.

2: Abg is gettting married.. mom wants more money at least $400.. she wants to pay this aunt who can do the decorations to be sent to the gilr side.. so $200 is for my mom monthly contribution to her.. the other $200 for the aunt..

3: Has to pay mendaki the remaining of my tuition scheme while in poly which is left with $113..

4: Cousin wants me to contribute for my brother wedding cake.. Expected budget would be $100..

5: Need to top up ez link card.. $100 this time try to make it enough for the whole mth.

6: Power supply charges for this mth $162..

So after calculating... i have to fork out..$837.. argh... i am like feeling as if i am living on my own.. I am dumbfounded..tats almost 90% of my salary gone... Haiz.. haiz.. haiz..

Its all abt money money money! Wats wrong with my mom ni.. I jus got settled down on my new job. My bro is getting married so why do i have to sacrifice all my money,, This month salary she said dun touch it cos she wants to use it. I mean wat the heck, Didnt my bro did his calculations???

If not enough then dun get married! sheesh. I am angry because i jus got started on tis job and now i am going to pay half of the house hold bills. fine had tat coming but not to touch my salary at all.. That jus seems unfair. He also one more nuthead. He knows he is getting married and wants mom to do the cooking shouldnt u jus give her the money to get watever tat she needs???

I have to get involved in tis. i am gonna ask him straight forwardly how is the planning for his wedding and expenses. Its so annoying.. He is more stable than me why do i have to fork out all of my salary.. I have a life too.. Btm line if he doesnt havbe enuff then postponed the marriage! either tat my mom is asking too much cos she has not even recieved the money for the expenses from him.. Though they already spent quite a few from the trips to jb...

Wats wrong with this family. Now i jus dun have the mood to eat ah. Maybe i would jus not eat tml and the next and the next..

TOday I woke up with an intense stiffness on my hamstring my tigh.Muscle so stiff tat i can barely walk properly. I should have done stretches before playing badminton couple of days ago. Though i dun feel the pain the day after as much as today. Geez talk abt the aftermath. he he

It rained so heavily for almost the whole day. So wat i did is jus to lay in the living rooms watch tv.. ha ha yep.. for once not going out on a weekend. Yea caught up with my MTV, Cartoon network and Hbo. most of the time cartoon network and mtv la he he. So after a while it got a bit boring tat i took random snaps of the living room he he.
Was Watching something abt spy girls on disney channel.

Hmm i dunno where to start sayin... Maybe i should say tis for all those who knoes me.. well diam diam lepu i am happily attached now. Dgn sapa? when the time is right i will tell he he.

I cant help it but eversince we r together sayang... i am drawn closer and closer to u.. Guess tis the power of love huh.. Can never understands it.Seeing u jus make me wanna smile always. It makes me forget abt my worries while i am with u..

By far.. just now was the most romantic moment of all.. Never would i tot something simple and plain like viewing the aeroplanes could be so calming and most of all makes me love u more deeper..

If i could make a movie.. i would video cam my moments spent with u...True i am naughty all the time.. I admit i am one crazy koyokboi he heh. Tapi i know my limits k yang so dun worry. Wats life without crazy ppl like me kan kan kan? he he at least tak setembok u lagik.. :x he he.
Below are the pics taken during our moments together..

Too tired to type. Besides my comp is laggin real bad. i wonder why. This week at work has been pretty relaxing. Had a game of badminton with my colleagues jus now. It was fun la. anyway i cant resist but to load tis music vid.. it makes me feel wat i feeling now abt u my dear syg.. Now y life focus ard u too..

Yang terindah terlukis di bibir mu.Tak pernah ku lihat senyuman sebegitu. Hari demi hari.. Minggu demi minggu.. Cintaku buatmu makin mekar bak sekumtum bunga yg sedang mengembang.. Sungguh indah dan menawan..

Aku hanya inginkan yang terbaik buatmu sayang.. Walau macam mana letih atau sibuk diriku ini, aku sentiasa melapangkan masa buat mu kekasihku.. KErna kau adalah separuh dari ku..

Inginku melukis hidup kita berdua seindah mungkin yang ku mampu.. Ye la mungkin mereka akan berkata cinta baru berputik semua nya indah.. bila dah lama macam macam lak karena..Namun begitu sayang kekasihmu ini akan cuba sedaya upaya untuk membuat jalinan kita berdua mesra seberapa banyak yang mungkin.. Sukar untukku mencari cinta..,Kau datang tanpa amaran dan menghiburi diriku yang amat kesepian.

Selama ini aku menutup pintu hatiku namun entah mengapa sayang kau dapat membukanya kembali..

Aku cinta padamu yang.. Warkah ini hanyalah buat mu.. Moga - moga kita dapat berkekalan hingga akhir hayat..

Ok i must say the CBNTM was such a great ideea!! In the beginning it really makes the adrenalin runs in my body. Cos as some of u know la i've always wanted to be a model. but reality check ha ha i am not handsome nor have the height for it. so all i can do is jus dress myself up to make up for tat short comings. So tis is the one photo tat i really liked for the first and last photoshoot i had with them.. Wish i know how to work on my posing skills.. lack of confidence..
This 1st pci was taken right after work. Rushed down as i dun wan to keep them waiting any longer..
Pose 1.(The best of the 3 pics taken)

Pose 2.(Do i look chubby here??)

Pose3. (was so so dead beat)

But of all pics taken right i still love tis one... taken by my fren at esplanade..

So au naturale. hehe.

Well lets say been donkey years since i last blog. Dunno where to begin.. I feel like re editing my template but then again am too dead beat to do so. Lets jus say i list out the things tat happened all this while..

Work:
Work has been like hell i tell u. Gosh jus imagine everyday have to stay and do overtime till 8pm. Meaning i start my day at 830am and i ended at 8pm... To top it up sometimes sat and sunday have to come back.. I spent my entire life to work.. Gosh i feel so bad though.. Lucky its for this mth of June. once July things would be back to normal i really hope so.. But still i make time for my loved ones.. yea u know urself wink.

Frens:
Ok i realised tis i have 2 diff sets of frens and both groups i am able to give my devotion equally. Though it does clashes sometimes and sory Keyis and Huda i didnt get to meet u tat night bcos of the photoshoot. Miss u lots Huda. But dun worry i am out of the game now so i will have plenty of chances to meet up with u guys.

Family:
As my brother wedding date approaches nearer my mom gets more excited. We bought most of the stuff already. Correction i mean she and her brothers and sisters have been going in and out of jb to buy the necessary stuff. My brother on the other hand had been bz getting the rentals for the chairs and wat not.. Looks like everything will be smooth insya allah.I on other hand will be gettin him a wedding cake. Hope i can find a decent one.

Now for U... my true love my whole heart.. my cute budak putih.. We r officially together and tat choice i made has never been better.. Clearly we r made for each other. Jus like u said i quoute, "we r the sweetest cutest couple jeng jeng jeng he he" yea kudos to tat! he he Tis week is kinda exciting well at least to me. Gave u surprises one after another. Took lots of courage to do all tat.. Our first kiss tat i will never forget it was sweet and passionate even though for a short while. At last the ice has been broken. We r closer together. I am here for u yang, tru bad and good times i will always be here for u.. I may not be the perfect lover but i can try to make u feel special. (",) we might have little fights in the future or even disagreement on some stuffs but i wan u to know at the end of the day i love u syg.. love u for who u r. Cheers to us.